The Bad:
The Ugly: Y'know what I'm going to do? I'm going to market a new type of dog food that's homework flavoured, make a gazillion dollars, and retire. Well, actually, I won't because I'd rather be making gazillions of dollars off this website (HA!!! HA!!!!! HAAAAA!!!!!!!!!). So if I hear about any of you lot making gazillions from homework-flavoured dog food, I am going to sue you for stealing my idea. Well, maybe not sue, but I'll definitely make an effort to punch you in the elbow. Right in the funny bone so that your hand goes all tingly and numb for a few seconds. Yeeeaaaah.
"I was too busy doing all my other homework."
This is a bad excuse because you are supposed to be an organised person now, and taking responsibility for your own blah blah blah whoop-dee-flipping blah. You've heard it before. I've heard it before. EVERYONE tries this one out and gets the SAME GOLLY-GOSHDARN DAGNABBITTED F**KING RESPONSE. Where do you think your teacher learned the "supposed to be organised... taking responsibility..." speech? Teacher's College? No. It is an ancient chant handed down through the generations of educators.
"My dog ate it."
Your dog ate it. Why is it that teachers are expected to believe that homework seems to be the staple diet of domesticated canines the world over? And what is it about mathematics homework that dogs prefer? Is it some deep-bred instinct in dogs that homework tastes nice; some kind of evolutionary throwback from the days when the ancestral dogs of ages long ago used to hunt for homework in the wild plains of the prehistoric world? Could it be that these primal hounds, travelling in packs, would attack the skipping flocks of history homework; the thundering herds of english homework; the mighty, long-tusked, woolly science homework; and the much-sought, wandering, defenceless -not to mention extremely tasty- maths homework? Perhaps this mystery is one that scientists of today can only guess at. Well, the scientists whose homework was kept out of reach of dogs, of course.
Other GBUs